A dull and idle boy was he

Whom Senator would one day be

For un-remarkability

He was a perfect twit

 

Scholastically he missed the bar

In sports he functioned under par

On looks alone he’d not go far

Nor live upon his wit

 

And yet this dreary lump of clay

Had one redeeming card to play

It was a talent, some would say

Not fit for gentle folk

 

The lad could look you in the eye

And let outrageous falsehoods fly

There was no fib, nor tale, nor lie

Too brazen to invoke

 

He lied his way through public school

Professors all he made the fool

Of truth no single molecule

Did stain his bar exam

 

At law his gift won accolades

Not possible in honest trades

In time he joined the vile crusades

A mayor’s seat to scam

 

With artful infidelity

He milked the city’s treasury

Invested in publicity

and stormed the Capitol

 

Without the truth to slow him down

The wretched lad now toasts the town

And spreads his lies the Beltway ‘round

To keep his pockets full

 

That little lying boy so bland

Is now a lying Congressman

With power over all the land

And hogwash in his heart

 

But now his native gift for fraud

Strikes no one as unduly odd

He is, of all that crew, by God

A well-respected part.