“You missed all the action,” the breathless woman told deputies upon their arrival at a downtown saloon about midnight. “I just got beat up.” It gets better. Seems she was in the bathroom when an anxious blonde berated her for “not moving out of her way fast enough.” The booze-fueled argument spilled into the cantina proper, culminating in a sucker punch to the complainant’s noggin. While several witnesses confirmed that account, her flaxen-haired foe had made herself scarce and nobody was able (or willing) to disclose her identity. In any case, the proud victim seemed well satisfied by telling the story to such an attentive audience, and asked officers to drop the matter. They did.