Lampshading with the Swells

So bright...

So bright…

The cream of Evergreen society was out in force Monday night at the annual Evergreen Area Chamber of Commerce Winter Gala.

This year’s bash, held at Mount Vernon Country Club and titled “The Future’s So Bright You Gotta’ Wear Shades,” will benefit the chamber’s many programs promoting area business. It was a great opportunity for local capitalists to rub elbows, see and be seen, and model inappropriate eyewear. Dressed to the nines, the festive crowd was a virtual sea of black hose and pinstripe, like a Gambino-family wedding with The Jack McCutchan Jazz Trio instead of Tony Bennett.

Gangsta chic

Gangsta chic

Event organizer and visionary Vicki Pinder had considerately arranged to have booze dispensaries placed about every 10 yards, ensuring that no dangerously parched guest was more than a few steps from relief. A stellar array of appetizers was provided by Evergreen Sports Grill, The Chocolate Moose Catering Co., SoHo Evergreen and A Taste of New York, giving revelers the unique opportunity to dip their lox and bagel in quail and brandied-pear mousse.

More than 250 items were up for bid at the silent auction. Guests were asked to bid on items ranging from the sublime – a hand-crafted Cava Gotica wine cabinet donated by Tesoros, to the sporting – a year’s membership in Blue Quill Angler’s Fly of the Month Club donated by Wayne Bernardo and LPL Financial Services, to the serviceable – a portable tool case put up by Evergreen Drug Co. Though Santa Claus was present in the room, his name appeared on no bid sheet, perhaps due to pressure from Elf’s Local 1.

Organizing for Power

Organizing for Power

Strategically positioned next to the stairs, Evergreen worthies Mike Carter and John Ellis formed an iron gauntlet through which few could pass without purchasing a $20 raffle ticket. With a $1,000 cash prize at stake, it was reassuring to see these two scrupulously honest men transacting ticket sales out of their pants-pockets.

After dinner, Benny Morris of Coldwell Banker and Mary Carrish of Bank of the West chatted amiably in the lobby. Interestingly, neither could precisely name the entrée they had just been served. Based on past experience, Morris leaned toward either chicken or prime rib. Carrish would say only that the meal was “yummy-yummy-shishummy,” a complimentary, if imprecise, appraisal.

WTF?!

WTF?!

At 8:30, chamber President Gary Matson took the podium to announce this year’s Chamber of Commerce award winners. The Volunteer of the Year Award went to prominent barrister Susan Stearns, whose local esteem was only enhanced by the brevity of her acceptance speech.

The coveted Business of the Year Award was bestowed on Colorado Serenity. In his grateful remarks, the publication’s founder, Doug Kinzy, vowed that, by working together, the chamber and local businesses will soon make Evergreen the “best city in the world.” Optimists can interpret this to mean that dollar bowling will soon be available in the Highway 285 corridor.

Lookin' good, Vaughn!

Lookin’ good, Vaughn!

Formally attired like a Monte Carlo baccarat dealer, Vaughn Long presided over the live auction, the evening’s main event. Running the show with good humor and brutal efficiency, he whipped the crowd into a bidding frenzy. The final item on the block was dinner for 10 at the Sculptured House (a.k.a. – Sleeper House), catered by Taste Buds Catering and served by the chamber executive committee. From an initial bid of $1,000, things quickly descended into a savage contest of wills. Carrish, driven by Taste Buds’ “yummy-yummy-shishummy” reputation, won the day for Bank of the West with a masterful $2,200 coup de gras.

Woody Allen not included.

Woody Allen not included.

Though emotionally exhausted, the crowd waited with anticipation to hear the winner of the $1,000 raffle announced. In a stroke of divine justice, the prize went to Ron Reed. Typical of a man as modest as he is great, Reed was not present for the drawing. Admired by all, personal hero to some, Reed’s goodness is surpassed only by his movie-star good looks. A pillar of the community, he is known as a man who would not hesitate for an instant to repay kind words with hard cash. Isn’t that right, Ron?